Tuesday, January 27, 2009

i keep dreaming that i wake up

i'm ill. again. i sleep all day long and every time i wake up, i feel like somebody's been beating the shit outta me. seriously, who are these people beating up innocent unprotected girls? go mess with someone your size!

this is the only time i miss living with the family. don't get me wrong, i love my family but i'm much happier now that we don't live together and i visit them from time to time. anyway, when you're living with the family, there's always someone to take care of you when you're ill. at least, they cook for themselves and you eat with them, so you don't have to worry about cooking. i on the other hand, keep dreaming that i get out of the bed, put some water in the cattle, take the potatoes out.then i wake up in my bed, hungry and without having anything done.

this is why i'm ill: well i was out on friday night and i sweated a lot. then i walked home and i gotta tell you, the weather wasn't anything close to mild. i think going to an open air festival the next day didn't help either. i think it was still totally worth it. i had a lot of fun. i went to the festival with "the english guy" who was in town for a short while. it was weird and great to see him again, after all that time. i got so excited on my way to meet him and as we were walking towards each other, as we hugged each other so tight and as he lifted me up in the air and turned me around... all the confusion, happiness, being unable to believe that we are actually together in one place, trying to keep it cool at the same time... i can't express those moments here. so in the end, turns out the feelings are still there but so is the distance. he is back in england and i'm still thinking about him. i'm confused all over again. just like the last time. deja vu. guess what? life sucks.

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